Affirmations For Children Of Immigrants
Read this if you’re feeling stuck between yourself and your parents.
In March, I wrote about how difficult it can be for immigrants and children of immigrants to choose themselves over their parents. Being (1) an immigrant myself who has struggled with this throughout my life and (2) a psychotherapist who works primarily with immigrants and racialized folks in therapy, means this topic is almost always on my mind and in my heart in some capacity.
I wanted to share some affirmations for anyone else struggling with finding the balance between your own values and needs vs. your parents’. Reminding myself of some of these things has helped me, so I hope it helps you too. Use these when and however you need — repeat them to yourself while standing in front of a mirror, write them down on sticky notes and leave them around your house, save them to the notes app on your phone and read them as needed, use them as prompts for your personal journaling or meditative practices, etc.
- I’m not a bad person/daughter/son because I value different things than my parents
- I don’t have to live my life the same exact way my parents have lived their lives
- I’m not trying to hurt my parents when I live my life differently than they do
- I’m allowed to make decisions that are in line with my personal values
- I can embrace the culture of the country I’m living in while still caring about the culture I was born in or that my parents are from
- I deserve to live a meaningful life and I get to decide what makes my life meaningful
- My parents don’t have to approve of or agree with every decision I make
- I’m not responsible for managing my parents’ reactions to my decisions, boundaries, or values
- Choosing myself doesn’t mean I’m trying to hurt my parents
- I can be grateful for my parents’ sacrifices while also making different decisions for myself
- I am allowed to find my own meaning in life
